Category Archives: Immature Love

Only Proactive People Can Genuinely Love Others, Reactive People Can’t (updated)

Posted on January 17, 2013 by

(The following is abridged and adapted and modified from Stephen R. Covey’s “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change”) Between stimulus and response, human beings have the freedom to choose—but only *if* we develop and … Continue reading →

Posted in "Man's Search for Meaning", "Siddhartha", Conscience, Conscious Love, Courage, Critical Thinking, Differentiation, Emotional Maturity, Hermann Hesse, Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, Love is a Choice, Love is a Decision, Love is Not a Feeling, Luke 6:32-35, M. Scott Peck, Mature Love, Mental Health, Perspective, Proactivity, Reactive, Real Love, Responsibility, Spiritual Growth, Stephen Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, The Examined Life, The Road Less Traveled, Truth, Viktor Frankl, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Love, the Feeling, versus Love, the Capacity (Immature Love versus Mature Love, part 2)

Posted on January 8, 2013 by

. A properly (or fully) developed human being is a Loving human being. Love, ultimately, is a capacity. A capacity that develops as the result of developing many other capacities and virtues and behavioral predispositions. Some of these are of … Continue reading →

Posted in chapter 13, Conscience, Conscious Love, Courage, Differentiation, Emotional Maturity, Friendship, Generosity, Gratitude, Honesty, Immature Love, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, Perspective, Real Love, Self-Love, Spiritual Growth, Thích Nhất Hạnh, Truth, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Why Real Love Is So Difficult & Rare (updated 12-26-2012)

Posted on December 26, 2012 by

. (This is an updated version of a post I first publish on Feb 28, 2012 — “Why Real Love Is So Difficult & Rare“) . . “We have lost our sense of values: when your fence falls, you mend … Continue reading →

Posted in Conscience, Conscious Love, Courage, Czeslaw Milosz, Differentiation, Emotional Maturity, Generosity, Honesty, Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, Love, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, Mental Health, Real Love, Self-Extension, Spiritual Growth, Thích Nhất Hạnh, Thomas Merton, Truth, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Happy Festivus, Momastery!

Posted on December 22, 2012 by

. . Ah, Festivus! That non-holiday holiday for the rest of us that features “the airing of grievances.” And on this Festivus Eve, I have a grievance that I want to air: Glennon Doyle Melton doesn’t really love Jesus. She … Continue reading →

Posted in "Don't Carpe Diem", "The Weight of Glory", C.S. Lewis, Carpe Diem, Glennon Melton, Gratitude, Immature Love, Matthew 25:40, Momastery, Real Love, Spiritual Growth, Thomas Merton, Truth, Uncategorized, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

C. S. Lewis on Love & Kindness (and the difference between the two)

Posted on December 20, 2012 by

. . The following is abridged & adapted from C. S. Lewis’s book “The Problem of Pain,” pages 35-44, & 58.  The parenthetical remarks are mine. . Are we not in an increasingly cruel age? Perhaps we are. But I … Continue reading →

Posted in "The Problem of Pain", C.S. Lewis, Emotional Maturity, Immature Love, Kindness, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, Perspective, Real Love, Spiritual Growth, Truth, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , | 6 Comments

Love *Is* Difficult

Posted on November 29, 2012 by

. Love is difficult. It is difficult to learn how to really love another person. It is difficult to learn how to love oneself. Loving another means caring deeply for that person, being good to that person, wanting the best … Continue reading →

Posted in Difficulty, Immature Love, Intimacy, Intimate Relationships, Love, Love is Not a Feeling, Mental Health, Real Love, Rilke, Truth, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

How Asking Just *One* Question Can Save Your Relationship

Posted on October 25, 2012 by

It’s easy to fall into a rut with your partner, to let things get stale, boring, monotonous, routine, to take each other for granted. But that’s not Love.  That’s not what Real Love does.  Genuine Love is about cherishing the … Continue reading →

Posted in Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, Love, Love is a Choice, Love is a Decision, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, Real Love | Tagged , , , , | 9 Comments

Mature Love v Immature Love

Posted on October 11, 2012 by

. Erich Fromm, in “The Art of Loving,” wrote, “Immature love says: ‘I love you because I need you.’ Mature love says: ‘I need you because I love you’.” The first statement is based on dependency—I am dependent on you, … Continue reading →

Posted in "Reverence for Life", "The Art of Loving", Albert Schweitzer, Conscience, Conscious Love, Courage, Death, Dependency, Emotional Maturity, Erich Fromm, Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, Love, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, Rilke, Spiritual Growth, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

How Close Does the Dragon’s Spume Have to Come to You, to Me, to Any of Us, Before We “Get It”?

Posted on June 27, 2012 by

“If You Knew” – Ellen Bass What if you knew you’d be the last to touch someone? If you were taking tickets, for example, at the theater, tearing them, giving back the ragged stubs, you might take care to touch … Continue reading →

Posted in "If You Knew", Death, Ellen Bass, Gurdjieff, Honesty, Immature Love, Intimacy, Intimate Relationships, Mental Health, Real Love, Truth, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

Why Do We Love?

Posted on June 19, 2012 by

Why Do We Love?  Is it for our own sake or the sake of the one we are loving? [W]e don’t love people and animals because we will have them forever, we love them because loving them changes us, makes … Continue reading →

Posted in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7, Conscience, Courage, Czeslaw Milosz, Emotional Maturity, Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, M. Scott Peck, Mature Love, Mental Health, Real Love, Thomas Merton, Truth, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments