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Author Archives: John
Marriage & the Marriage Vows
We all know marriage (Christian marriage, Catholic Marriage, any religiously sanctioned marriage) involves making sacred promises to another. But do we really get what those promises involve? Do we really understand — meaning grasp, deeply comprehend — that we are … Continue reading
Dr. Tori Olds’ Interview with Dr. Stan Tatkin, Founder of PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy)
(My abridged transcription. Parentheses and bold and italics are mine.) Let me start with things that are true about the human primate. We are threat animals: if we do anything really really well we are good at scanning for threat … Continue reading
Posted in Dr. Stan Tatkin, Dr. Tori Olds, Emotional Maturity, Growing Up, Intimate Relationships, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, PACT - Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy, Personal Growth, Self-Awareness
Tagged Dr. Stan Tatkin, Dr. Tori Olds, Mature Love, PACT, Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy
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Is Your Heart Like a Cup or Like a River?
From Zen Buddhist Monk Thich Nhat Hahn’s book “How to Love” — “If you pour a handful of salt into a cup of water, the water becomes undrinkable. But if you pour the salt into a river, people can continue … Continue reading
Posted in Conscious Love, Ego, Emotional Maturity, Intimate Relationships, Love is a Choice, Love is a Decision, Love Is a Verb, Love is an Act of Will, Love is Not a Feeling, Luke 6:32-35, Mature Love, Personal Growth, Real Love, Self-Extension, Thích Nhất Hạnh, The Examined Life, What is Love?
Tagged "How To Love", First Corinthians 13: 4-7, Love, Love is More than a Feeling, Love is Not a Feeling, Luke 6:32-35, Saint Paul, Thích Nhất Hạnh
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C. S. Lewis on Evil & “Enemy-Occupied Territory”
From C.S. Lewis, “Mere Christianity,” at the end of chapter 2; my abridgement One of the things that surprised me when I first started reading the New Testament seriously was that it talked so much about a Dark Power in … Continue reading
Posted in C.S. Lewis, Courage, Evil, Morality
Tagged C.S. Lewis, character, Christianity, Good and Evil
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“Only the Best in Us Can Talk About the Worst in Us; What’s Worst in Us Lies About Itself and its Own Existence.
“Only the best in us can talk about the worst in us; what’s worst in us lies about itself and its own existence.” — David Schnarch, author of “Passionate Marriage” and “Intimacy & Desire“ Also from David Schnarch, Ph.D. — … Continue reading
Posted in "The Scarlet Letter", C.S. Lewis, Conscience, Critical Thinking, David Schnarch, Dostoyevsky, Intimacy, Intimate Relationships, Lies, Love, Maurice Nicoll, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Nietzsche, Truth
Tagged C.S. Lewis, Conscience, David Schnarch, Dostoyevsky, Lies, Maurice Nicoll, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Nietzsche, Richard Feynman, Truth
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M. Scott Peck on Dedication to the Truth
What follows is my abridgment from pp. 44-62 of “The Road Less Traveled.” The third tool of discipline or technique of dealing with the pain of problem-solving, which must continually be employed if our lives are to be healthy and … Continue reading
The Ego (Ego, Self-Love, Lies, Darkness v Truth, Love, Light, Conscience)
Some thoughts on the ego. First, defining the term. The ego as used herein is not used in the sense that Freud used the term ego (rational principle, reality factor, slave of the Id). Instead, the term ego is being … Continue reading
Genuine Love & Conscience: Truth v Lies
My writings on this blog thus far have largely focused on differentiating Genuine Love — willing and acting towards the best and deepest and highest interests of the other person as an actual distinct and unique human being in their … Continue reading
Posted in Gospel of John, Gospel of Matthew, Love, Love is a Choice, Love is a Commitment, Love is a Decision, Love is an Act of Will, Love is Not a Feeling, M. Scott Peck, Personal Growth, Real Love, Self-Awareness, Spiritual Growth, The Examined Life
Tagged Honesty, M. Scott Peck, Real Love, Truth
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What Is Real True Love? 