Category Archives: Love is a Decision

In the Gap Between Stimulus and Response is Where Real Love Occurs

Posted on March 12, 2016 by John

I’ll meet you there (to riff on Rumi). Or better yet: Start meeting your partner there. Choice is sexy. When partners choose when and where and how they want to have sex, that is sexy. When they make a choice to engage … Continue reading →

Posted in Character, Conscious Love, Intimacy, Intimate Relationships, Love, Love is a Choice, Love is a Decision, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, Mental Health, Mindfulness, Personal Growth, Perspective, Real Love, Self-Awareness, The Examined Life, Truth, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Love Means Opening Yourself Up

Posted on February 15, 2016 by John

. .   A big part of love means consciously opening yourself up to your beloved and sharing with your partner from what’s best in you. This means consciously choosing and risking being vulnerable and trusting your partner and revealing … Continue reading →

Posted in "The Four Loves", C.S. Lewis, Conscious Love, Critical Thinking, Love is a Choice, Love is a Commitment, Love is a Decision, Love Is a Verb, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, Personal Growth, Perspective, Real Love, Self-Awareness, Thích Nhất Hạnh, The Examined Life, Truth, Vulnerability, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

The Marriage Box. (Relationships Are About What We Put Into Them, Not What We Get Out of Them)

Posted on December 4, 2013 by John

“Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they’re trying to find someone who’s going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a … Continue reading →

Posted in Anthony Robbins, Love is a Decision, Love Is a Verb, Love is an Act of Will, Love is Not a Feeling, Marriage Box, Mature Love, Mental Health, Personal Growth, Real Love, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

A Love Story in Pictures — Taylor Morris & Danielle Kelly

Posted on November 21, 2013 by John

I recently came across the story online of this incredible young couple, Taylor Morris & Danielle Kelly, and I wanted to share the site I originally found the story on as well as other sites I found while looking more … Continue reading →

Posted in Commitment, Love is a Choice, Love is a Commitment, Love is a Decision, Love Is a Verb, Mature Love, Real Love, Taylor Morris, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

Only Proactive People Can Genuinely Love Others, Reactive People Can’t (updated)

Posted on January 17, 2013 by John

(The following is abridged and adapted and modified from Stephen R. Covey’s “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change”) Between stimulus and response, human beings have the freedom to choose—but only *if* we develop and … Continue reading →

Posted in "Man's Search for Meaning", "Siddhartha", Conscience, Conscious Love, Courage, Critical Thinking, Differentiation, Emotional Maturity, Hermann Hesse, Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, Love is a Choice, Love is a Decision, Love is Not a Feeling, Luke 6:32-35, M. Scott Peck, Mature Love, Mental Health, Perspective, Proactivity, Reactive, Real Love, Responsibility, Spiritual Growth, Stephen Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, The Examined Life, The Road Less Traveled, Truth, Viktor Frankl, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

How to Fall in Love Again

Posted on December 7, 2012 by John

(This is an updated version of a page I first posted over a year ago . . . )  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . “I have no … Continue reading →

Posted in C.S. Lewis, GinaParris.com, Glennon Melton, Love, Love is a Choice, Love is a Commitment, Love is a Decision, Love is Not a Feeling, M. Scott Peck, Mature Love, Momastery, Real Love, Self-Extension, The Road Less Traveled, Thomas Merton, What is Love?, Zig Ziglar | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

How Asking Just *One* Question Can Save Your Relationship

Posted on October 25, 2012 by John

It’s easy to fall into a rut with your partner, to let things get stale, boring, monotonous, routine, to take each other for granted. But that’s not Love.  That’s not what Real Love does.  Genuine Love is about cherishing the … Continue reading →

Posted in Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, Love, Love is a Choice, Love is a Decision, Love is Not a Feeling, Mature Love, Real Love | Tagged , , , , | 11 Comments

It Changes EVERYTHING! (part 2)

Posted on January 31, 2012 by John

I was reading through another blog this morning, and as I read through one of her posts I came across the following paragraph and I thought it to be very wise and well-stated. And then I just started writing my … Continue reading →

Posted in Conscious Love, Courage, Differentiation, Emotional Maturity, Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, Love is a Choice, Love is a Commitment, Love is a Decision, Love is an Act of Will, Love is Not a Feeling, M. Scott Peck, Mature Love, Mental Health, Real Love, Responsibility, Stephen Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, The Road Less Traveled, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

How To Fall In Love Again (updated 1/10/12)

Posted on January 10, 2012 by John

“I have no way of knowing whether or not you married the wrong person. But I do know that if you treat the wrong person like the right person, you could well end up having married the right person after … Continue reading →

Posted in C.S. Lewis, Conscious Love, Courage, Emotional Maturity, Gandhi, GinaParris.com, Immature Love, Intimate Relationships, Love, Love is a Choice, Love is a Commitment, Love is a Decision, Love is an Act of Will, Love is Not a Feeling, M. Scott Peck, Mature Love, Mental Health, Real Love, Self-Extension, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Happy Birthday: Intimacy & the Birth of One’s (Deepest) Self

Posted on January 9, 2012 by John

This is what intimacy is all about, in my opinion: it’s about having some real depth to oneself, continuing to develop your own depths, yet finding another who is also similarly and compatibly deep, and sharing your depth and exploring … Continue reading →

Posted in "The God Who Loves You", C.S. Lewis, Carl Dennis, Conscience, Conscious Love, Courage, Death, Emotional Maturity, Immature Love, Intimacy, Intimate Relationships, Love is a Commitment, Love is a Decision, Love is an Act of Will, Mature Love, Mental Health, Real Love, Responsibility, Rilke, Sarah Ruhl, Self-Extension, Spiritual Growth, Waking Up, What is Love? | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments